Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Heartache
There is nothing you can do to avoid it. It is going to happen, comes with the territory; you know teenagers, high school all that. You cannot prepare them nor can you make it better when it happens. Seeing my daughter go through the break up of a boy, a very nice boy, 1+ years, is just killing me.
She doesn't talk about it, she didn't tell her friends, she is acting normal which leads me to believe one thing. That she is holding everything tucked inside of her like a nice little folded piece of paper.
Then one night I got a text from her. All it said was "I miss him." That is all she needed to say, I know she is heart broken, hurt, rejected. I feel that pain for her, in the deepest part of my chest.
All I can do is be there to text her back. "I know, it will get better."
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
3 years later...
I was really busy for the last 3 years, honestly. :) My life has changed in so many ways both good and bad. I am so thankful for my friends (Karen, Kim, Lana, Melissa & Libby) who listen to my insanity incessantly. You guys are the best!
So here are a few updates:
Daughter just turned 15 and is freshman in high school. Yeah I know, just yesterday (uh hum) I was posting about laying in bed and reading to her, that hasn't happened in 5 years. Had I known my time was so short would I do anything different? No, I thoroughly enjoyed ignoring the dishes and laundry to spend that time with her. I treasure our nocturnal rituals and wish for them to come back, however futile that seems.
She is in love. Yes, she is gloriously in 15 year old love with her boyfriend of almost a year now. He is so kind, respectful and sweet to her, I hope it last. I am trying to be an optimist. It's fun to go through this new experience along her side, I hope they enjoy every second of "being in love", because that is so magical. No need to worry though, I have set rules and boundaries and so does his mother. We are united in our cause to keep them 15!
Son 10, I don't know where to begin with this character. He keeps us in stitches most of the time. Has learned to snow board which apparently is very cool. I think he likes a girl in his class because he talks about her sometimes, but if you asked him he would deny it and get mad at us for having just mentioned it.
Hubby, well he's just fine, getting older like myself. Wow, wth happened we used to be those kids?!!!
Life changing moment :
On March 27, 2010, my Dad unexpectedly passed away and my world shattered. I am not the same person I was on March 26, 2010. I never will be. I finally managing to process the information, that he is gone. It took a long time to get past the trauma of his death. I can think about him now with out crying. I try to honor him daily by saying or doing at least one nice thing for someone else. Still, there is a huge black void in my life that used to be him. I miss him, he was my go to person. You just have no idea until it is you. For all my friends who have had parents who have passed away (and there are many), I say to you I am so sorry, I truly understand your pain.
Perhaps just putting this all in writing will get me back to blogging, or therapy without a co-pay.
I have missed it.
So here are a few updates:
Daughter just turned 15 and is freshman in high school. Yeah I know, just yesterday (uh hum) I was posting about laying in bed and reading to her, that hasn't happened in 5 years. Had I known my time was so short would I do anything different? No, I thoroughly enjoyed ignoring the dishes and laundry to spend that time with her. I treasure our nocturnal rituals and wish for them to come back, however futile that seems.
She is in love. Yes, she is gloriously in 15 year old love with her boyfriend of almost a year now. He is so kind, respectful and sweet to her, I hope it last. I am trying to be an optimist. It's fun to go through this new experience along her side, I hope they enjoy every second of "being in love", because that is so magical. No need to worry though, I have set rules and boundaries and so does his mother. We are united in our cause to keep them 15!
Son 10, I don't know where to begin with this character. He keeps us in stitches most of the time. Has learned to snow board which apparently is very cool. I think he likes a girl in his class because he talks about her sometimes, but if you asked him he would deny it and get mad at us for having just mentioned it.
Hubby, well he's just fine, getting older like myself. Wow, wth happened we used to be those kids?!!!
Life changing moment :
On March 27, 2010, my Dad unexpectedly passed away and my world shattered. I am not the same person I was on March 26, 2010. I never will be. I finally managing to process the information, that he is gone. It took a long time to get past the trauma of his death. I can think about him now with out crying. I try to honor him daily by saying or doing at least one nice thing for someone else. Still, there is a huge black void in my life that used to be him. I miss him, he was my go to person. You just have no idea until it is you. For all my friends who have had parents who have passed away (and there are many), I say to you I am so sorry, I truly understand your pain.
Perhaps just putting this all in writing will get me back to blogging, or therapy without a co-pay.
I have missed it.
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